san antonio [: be gone all weekend.
so yeah. im going to bed NOW.
haha so i will be alive tomorrow.
im real excited [:
except nobody i really care about will be
there. i really wanted mister weaver to
come… because he is the only person
that really makes me want to smile and
perform, idk. its wierd. i guess i think
he cares about me more than anyone.

family cant come. hello its in san
antonio. and its been a year since my
uncle died… and i really wanna go see
his grave or where his ashes in, like its
in some place, but im scared to ask
my family to go see him, because i hate
crying in front of people. ): but i miss him.
he is the one other person that really really
made me happy and smile and look forward
to something besides that guy up there. ^

- - - - i dont know. just last year i thought of my
uncle the whole time i performed. i had it in my
mind he would be watching the whole thing. he was
there in the stands. clapping so loudly for me.
and now its like he is gone forever. its like i
forgot what he sounds like. and …ughh.

anyways im gunna stop. cant be emo before san
antonio …. blehhh. idk. i just havent talked to anyone
in a while about anything. and this is the only other
way i can really vent. and it still isnt like i got everything
out. i just wanna scream in a pillow. AHHHHHHHHHH!
okay for real now. night