lets seee. wow lots have changed…. im still pretty stupid. and i make the same damn mistakes, not only with the same person…. but with others. but… im not overlly attatched anymore. which i guess is good. i just… really wish highschool was over. im sick of this. i want the real thing. i want true love. i want someone that i can trust, that i know will always be there. someone that i can think about all day and know he is thinking about me too. someone who doesnt just want sex.

but i doubt i will find that soon.

and i actually like this guy, and the first ‘date’ he made a move. and i really thought it would have been different you know. and he says he likes me, but gosh… i just want to go on a ‘date’ with someone, and not do stuff the first night. i dont want that anymore. i want something truly amazing. why dont guys even give girls the chance. why dont you even look for love.

im sick of just being peoples toys.

im making a stand right now for me. im done being who i used to be. im a really great person. i know that. im a great listener, a great friend. and im just waiting for the right guy to notice that part. not the.. oh damn she has boobs. and NO! im done!!

im on a search. i will wait for the right person!

so wish me luck :)